Lumberjack Day/Script
Notice: This article is in need of some cleaning up. Some stuff might be inaccurate, needs to be expanded on, or just unnecessary. Lend a hand to help out spruce up this article. ---- The following is a transcript for the episode "Lumberjack Day". Script Scaredy: “Ow. Would you like a can of “Leftovers-in-a-Can”, sir? Ow! 'Kay. Here you go.” Elderly Turtle: “Sounds like leftover stew and cabbage rolls. I don't like it. Macaroni and cheese cake. Hate it.” Scaredy: “How can you tell just by-” Elderly Turtle: “Here. 63 rows up. Second from the left. Come on, brussel sprouts. Feel lucky.” Scaredy: “Okay.” Nestor: “Attention...” Scaredy: “Timber!” Nestor: “This Monday, the store will be closed for the annual Lumberjack Day holiday.” Elderly Turtle: “Changed my mind.” Scaredy: “Lumberjack Day. My favorite day of the year. A day when everyone should-” Hatton: “Do absolutely nothing.” Buck: “I do less than nothing on Lumberjack Day. I sleep in, get up, take a nap, roll over, and go back to bed.” Hatton: “Sounds exhausting.” Scaredy: “No, it's called Lumberjack Day because-” Nestor: “Because some guy named “Jack” lumbered around. I think.” Mildred: “Who cares? It's a day off.” Scaredy: “Hey, Lumberjack Day isn't- You guys have the wrong- It's all about- Where did you- I can't believe it, Dave. Nobody knows the true meaning of Lumberjack Day.” Dave: “I do. It's when you dress up as a log and roll from house to house. Or is that “Log-o-Wairness Day”?” Scaredy: “Dave, the citizens of Balsa City need a history lesson, and I'm gonna give it to 'em!” Dave: “Ooh! Ooh! I wonder if my log costume still fits.” ---- Scaredy: “Thank you all for coming. Wow, this is quite in a turnout.” Carl: “I thought it was Bingo Night.” Buck: “Yeah! Me, too!” Scaredy: “This is more important than Bingo.” Buck: “Is it Parcheesi?” Scaredy: “Um... no. Put on your 3D glasses... now. This is the story of Lumberjack. During the 7 second war of 1777, Lumberjack battled the invading termites. When that didn't work, Jack handed out flyers to the termites, for free swimming lessons. Turns out termites can't swim. Jack went on to build the great city of Balsa. Resting only to eat pancakes and widowed friendship sticks. And that's what the giant tree outside of City Hall symbolizes.” Buck: “I always thought it symbolize the tree.” Scaredy: “And that's why this Monday, we should celebrate Lumberjack Day properly.” Hatton: “Let's fill the town with termites.” Scaredy: “Um... no, that's not-” Carl: “We should cut down the old Balsa tree.” Scaredy: “No! No, no! No!” Buck: “I'm gonna wax my chest.” Scaredy: “What? Stop! Didn't- Didn't you hear any of what I said?” Dave: “Can we eat pancakes and stuff?” Scaredy: “Yes, yes you can.” Buck: “Can we sing the Lumberjack song?” Scaredy: “Yes! See, now your gettin' it!” Mayor Runswell: “Thank you, squirrel, for showing us how Lumberjack Day should be celebrated.” Scaredy: “Your welcome, Mayor Runswell!” Mayor Runswell: “Now. On to more serious matters. End of the N: 44. N44. Anyone? Mm, anyone?” ---- Scaredy: “All right, Richard. I'm off to go-” Woman Canary: “So join me tomorrow for a three-hour Lumberjack Day special brought to you by... Axe Saw deodorant. Smelling like a lumberjack shouldn't be this easy. Oh! Oh! Wow.” Scaredy: “Who would buy that? Oh. Well, I guess your getting into the spirit.” ---- Scaredy: “Happy Lumberjack Day Eve.” Paddy: “♫ Chop, chop, choppy all day long so break it down, yo. He was a lumberjack from outer space, fightin' the dinosaurs. All up in his face, they ran away and then Chop became a shoe salesman, 'cause that's his game, stop. ♫ That's right.” Scaredy: “That's all wrong!” Paddy: “Buy my new holiday album. In stores today.” Scaredy: “That's not what Lumberjack Day is about.” Mayor Runswell: “Thank you, Paddy. Tomorrow morning will be the biggest shopping day Balsa City has ever seen. And tonight for a small fee, children can have their photo taken with... the Lumberjack Day jack rabbit.” Scaredy: “There was no Lumberjack Day jack rabbit. And that is a cat.” Mayor Runswell: “And is if that wasn't enough, we're also selling chocolate axes for $1 each. Who wants one?” Hatton: “Ow. Why would you do that?” Mayor Runswell: “Em... Hooray for Balsa? Store's open in 6AM, folks, so get some Zs. I know that I'' will sleep like a ''log.” Scaredy: “I've had enough.” ---- Hatton: “Lumberjack sale tomorrow. All prices will be chopped.” Scaredy: “What? Not here, too! Overprice flannel?” Nestor: “Scaredy, I need you to work at double shift tomorrow. No. Triple shift. No. Quadruple shift. It's going to be a zoo in here.” Scaredy: “But we're closed tomorrow.” Nestor: “Not anymore. It's going to be our busiest day ever. Ever!” Dave: “Scaredy. Why so upset, Scare?” Scaredy: “Dave, Lumberjack Day isn't supposed to be about buying stuff.” Dave: “Check out my cool new hat? If you want one, you better move fast. They're selling like... hotcakes. Get it?” Scaredy: “Yes, Dave. I get it.” Dave: “'Cause they are hotcakes.” Scaredy: “Don't you see this is all wrong? Come on, I'll show you what's happening to the town.” Hatton: “Official Lumberjack Day flyers on sale. Half price.” Scaredy: ““Everything must go”. Hmm. Everything must go. Dave, this is a sign.” Dave: “Good. This is a sign. And this is a rock, that's a tree, that's a bad drinking fountain.” Scaredy: “To save this holiday, we have to take everything what's wrong with it.” Dave: “But isn't that stealing?” Scaredy: “No.” Dave: “Phew.” Scaredy: “Dave, we've gotta save Lumberjack Day. Again.” ---- Scaredy: “That was a Dave: “You go. I'll just-” Scaredy: “Okay then. I'm off to save Lumberjack Day.” ---- Mayor Runswell: “It's a disaster. A disaster.” Scaredy: “Hang on, everyone, calm down. All is not lost.” Buck: “Your right. It was stolen.” Scaredy: “Or maybe the people who took it we're just trying to teach everyone else a lesson and hey. What could this be? Sweet acorns. Enough batter to make 10,000 Lumberjack Day pancakes? What is this doing here? We should have a Lumberjack pancake breakfast. What do ya say?” Buck: “I could eat 10 of these.” Scaredy: “Oh. And look. We can all sit on those log benches that have mysteriously have shown up overnight.” Buck: “I could eat 10 of these.” Scaredy: “I'm makin' the pancakes. Now all we need is some Lumberjack songs.” Mayor Runswell: “I'm proud of you. You saved Lumberjack Day.” Dave: “Wow. Scaredy did it. Woohoo! This is so moving. This is so moving! Scaredy!” Scaredy: “Now this is what Lumberjack Day is all about.” Dave: “Stop it! Bad.” Scaredy: “Uh, oh.” Dave: “What are we gonna do?” Scaredy: “Quiet. I bet no one knows we're in here. Surprise.” Dave: “Surprise.” Mayor Runswell: “Start talkin'.” Dave: “Funny story. His idea!” Scaredy: “Happy Lumberjack Day?” Mayor Runswell: “Get 'im!” Scaredy: “I hope things don't get this out of hand on Tuba Day.” Mayor Runswell: “Hey, that's right. Tuba Day is only a week away. We should start planning.” Carl: “I'll Nestor: “I'll sell Buck: “I'm gonna wax my chest!” Scaredy: “Wait. Stop. That isn't how you celebrate Tuba Day. Tuba Day is about- Mayor Runswell: “Let's get started.” Dave: “Phew. We was worried that you were going to-” Scaredy: “Empty the sled, Dave. We're going to save Tuba Day.”